Let me give a shout-out to some folks who have helped in a BIG way:
1. Jimps - He and his wife came over on Friday night (even though his wife was fighting a nasty sinus infection). They painted, took down cabinets, tore off wallpaper, and anything else I asked. I had nothing to give them but pizza and beer. You guys rock. Thanks so much for all your help.
2. Aunt Charm - Without even asking, she showed up at the house and helped tape and paint. She painted my entire dining room for me. You're the best!
3. Dad - While eating lunch with my parents I mentioned to my husband that our lawn needed to be mowed. We don't have a mower yet, so we planned to buy one the next day. Within a few minutes of returning to our house, I see my dad pull up and haul his lawn mower out of his backseat. Not only does he bring his mower to us, but he also mows the lawn for us and does the edging! How awesome is that? Not to mention that he's spent endless hours working on the inside of the house too.
4. Mom - Last but NOT least, my mom. She has been at the house constantly since we closed. I work all day, so I can't be at the house as much as I want. She's picked up the slack that I leave because of work. She's done the suede paint in the entire living room, taken down all the nasty drapes left by the previous owners, stripped all the tile in the bathroom, and kept the entire house clean and in order while doing so. She is amazing. I have such awesome parents.
Now for the fun part. Whenever you move into a new place the question "Why?" always comes up.
Why did they put that there?
Why did they do that?
Why didn't they do that?
Why isn't this here?
I asked that very same question as I knocked myself out on the corner of a shelf, hung right at head-height when I got out of my car in the garage. When I awoke from my daze, I burst into tears, partly because of the pain and partly because of the huge project we had just thrust upon ourselves. I was feeling a little bit overwhelmed. The husband felt so bad, after he took me inside and got me some ice and water, he instantly went out to the garage and destroyed the shelf. Some husbands protect their wives against real dangers like spiders and bad people. My husband protects me from myself:
Everyone's been asking all day what I did to myself. I got bored of the story that made me look stupid, so I told them that I was shoved around by my husband over the weekend.* That's a much better story than "I ran into a shelf." Though it doesn't look that bad in the picture, it's one of those bruises that is so sensitive, I want to cry anytime I accidentaly touch it. This morning, my hairbrush grazed over it and I had to lay down for a minute until the throbbing subsided.
Just another thing to add to the list of stupid things done this year:
1. Hung out in men's locker room
2. Beat up by shelf in garage
*I am not trying to make light of the real problem of domestic violence. If you read this and have been abused by your spouse, you have my deepest sympathies. If you have not already sought help, please do so by going to www.endabuse.org.
12 comments:
I love your disclaimer about domestic violence. And sorry about your head!!
wow, sounds like something i would do. major clutz right here (me). i feel down the stairs in the cafeteria in college one week before finals! i basically slid down them in my bare shin. it killed me. and i had to explain to everyone why i was limping around campus. and i have ugly bruises on my graduation pics. . .
the more i read your blog, the more i realize that we are leading parallel lives. well... i don't beat myself up with a shelf, but I do blame things on my husband. i have to have ANOTHER root canal and the dentist asked me if i got hit a lot in the jaw when i played college basketball. while that is actually true and has caused me more than my fair share of TMJ and chipped teeth, i thought i would have some fun and tell the dentist that i thought this tooth problem probably came from when my husband hit me because i disagreed with him once. (as if that would ever happen. if there was any violence in my house you can be assured its coming from me during one of my menstrual cycles.) you should have seen the look on his face. moving on.... i, too, love your disclaimer. add that to this comment as well.
O.U.C.H.!!
My husband hates it when I have a bruise any where on my body because it makes HIM look bad! (like when we're in a restaurant together, and I start to cry...he's afraid everyone's looking at him like he's a total jerk breaking up with me!)
At least you have the basis for some good stories, drop the whole "I hit my head on a shelf thing" and go for more of a "I chased this pit bull down the street..." mKay?
My boss had an eye touch up surgery, and she got a huge bruise from it. She got tired of people asking her what happened to her eye so she told them her husband had knocked her around. Everyone in the room stopped doing what they were doing and she said she swears she could hear the crickets chearping. Bad move on her part as everyone knew her husband. She quickly had to retract her statement.
I also liked your disclaimer, it's funny to joke about but sad if it really happens.
when my son was born, he had a TINY red mark near his temple that went away around age four. i got so sick to death of strangers asking me "what happened you your baby's face?" that i stooped to looking a woman in the eye and saying, "that's where i burned him with my cigarette when he wouldn't quit crying."
and i pushed my shopping cart along as if nothing had happened.
Loo's lying.
she's growing a third nipple.
Gayle - thanks, I thought it appropriate to add at the end
Tabitha - I have this constant bruise on my leg from my filing cabinet at work. You'd think I would have learned by now ... nope, I think I'm a glutton for abuse.
Nytro - Like I said before, I think you're stalking me. It's time to fess up. Parallel lives my butt. :)
Little Miss - Unlike your husband, all mine does is poke fun when I have an injury. He doesn't feel bad at all. Just take a look at his comment.
Just Me - Sounds like your boss doesn't know when to joke around and when to keep her mouth shut. Awesome!
Rebecca Marie - LMAO!!! Did you really say that to someone in the grocery store?
BSC - BAD!!!!
Lori dear, that's a totally legit injury.
Mine, however, was not!
stalking is only a problem if the stalkee has a problem with it. i haven't heard you come up with a valid complaint yet! as my word verification word says: sbpfu!!!
sbpfu to you too! Ha!
Never said I had a problem with your stalking, I was only pointing out the fact that you are stalking me.
neteyfh!
yes, i swear that i did. but seriously, how much of "what in the name of all things sacred and holy is wrong with your child?" can you hear before you snap?
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