Lamaze

I just now realized that I haven't blogged about our experience with the Lamaze classes we've been taking. DISCLAIMER!! Just because I'm taking these classes doesn't mean I expect to go through labor and delivery with no drugs. No siree! I will make a feeble attempt at using the breathing exercises to help with the pain. But when it comes down to it, I can see myself getting an epidural. That's just the way it rolls my homies. So the main reason I wanted to take these classes was so I could learn what to expect when we go to the hospital, and also to meet other couples in the same boat as us.

Yes, we have watched several full-frontal videos on natural childbirth and c-sections. Yes, we have seen several up-close shots of breast milk being expressed. That's all fine and good, but my favorite part of the class is the last 30 minutes ... massage time! On the first day of class our instructor (an RN in the hospital we plan to deliver) taught all of the coaches (Dads) how to massage and pamper all of the moms. Oh yay! So for the last 30 minutes of class BSC gets the pleasure of rubbing my shoulders, my back, my head and my belly all for the sole purpose of making me relax. I LOVE IT! I'm supposed to be pretending I'm having a contraction or something, but whatever ... I'd rather sit back and enjoy the free massage. He's also supposed to help count with the breathing, but I just laugh at him. I don't know why it strikes me as funny, it just does. The first time I laughed at him, he got mad. He took the "coach" title a bit too seriously and started treating me like I was a football player. He got super intense and started yelling "FOCUS, FOCUS damn it!" I think if he does that to me in the delivery room, I may have to rip off one of his ears and yell back some creative profanity.

All of the couples in the class are on their first child, so none of us really know what to expect when we go into labor. Only two out of the seven couples in the class are having girls, the rest of us are having boys (so that Chinese calendar thing must really be somewhat accurate, huh?). Most of the moms seem rather comfortable with everything that is about to happen with our bodies: we've read the books, talked with friends, and done research on the internet. We are prepared! The dads, on the other hand, seem to be learning most of this pregnancy, labor and delivery stuff for the first time ... including BSC. Like it's all of a sudden hitting them that "holy crap, my wife's not just getting fat, there's really a CHILD in there!"

Some of the questions asked by the dads are rather humorous too. For instance:
"Do the babies automatically start suckling the mom's teets?"
Teets? Did he really just say suckling teets? We're not farm animals! One of the other dads even muttered under his breath "Uhhh, I didn't know my wife had teets." BSC and I still get a kick out of that one!

But overall the Lamaze classes have been great. I really enjoy them. It's nice being around people who are going through the same things I am and have the same questions and concerns I do. Our instructor is really helpful in explaining things in detail and preparing us for anything that might happen during delivery. She's passed around the epidural needle (so now I KNOW how huge that thing is), shown us the baby monitors, the contraction monitors and answered tons and tons of questions from scared moms and dads. At our last class she even gave us all a pair of booties that she had knitted for each one of our babies!

So the Lamaze class has been a good experience for me. Waste of money or time? Not on your life! I get a 30 minute massage each time I go.