A few more things to add ...

1. I also forgot to tell everyone that someone stole my purse from the gym this weekend. This is what happened:

After 1 1/2 hours of a really good work-out I decided to cool off in the locker room and stretch my sore muscles. I walk in to pleasantly find the locker room to be empty. I'm not one who enjoys seeing sweaty naked bodies trying to put clothes back on. So I spend the next 10 minutes in the locker room cooling down, relaxing a bit and watching the TV in there. I finally decide it's time to go and I reach for the lock on my locker, and IT'S NOT THERE. Immediate panic sets in before I try to calm myself down and think rationally. I always use locker #27. I look at the locker I'm standing at, it's #21. That must be it, I'm just an idiot standing at the wrong locker! I find #27, but it's on the wrong side of the locker room. Hmmmmm. I finally figured out that I just spent the last 15 minutes hanging out in the men's locker room. Yep, I'm a smart one.

2. I saw THE SAME GUY from lunch last week again today. The one with the huge protruding belly, Rolling Stones pj pants, and home-made Black Sabbath tshirt. I think he's stalking me.

3. I tried to use the restroom during my lunch break. The restrooms in this particular eating establishment are the kind where there's only one toilet, so the door is locked from the outside. I go up to the bathroom door to find it locked. Someone must be in there, so I wait, and wait ... and wait. I can hear some racket coming from the bathroom, so I know I'm not just some idiot waiting on an empty bathroom. Finally about 10 minutes later a lady walks out. I debate whether or not to go in the bathroom. If someone's been in there for THAT long, something had to go wrong with their bowels. I decide to risk my nose. I walk in the bathroom to find that this lady spent the last 10 minutes trashing the bathroom. She left both knobs to the sink ON FULL BLAST, she dismantled the TP dispenser from the wall, emptied the paper towel dispenser, and water was all over the place. What in the world was she doing in there!?!?! I didn't care. I had to go. I lightly stepped over the water and assumed "the stance" (I'm not sitting on a public toilet) and complete my business all in a couple of minutes. I walk out and see that this woman had the audacity to eat in the restaurant after what she had done to the bathroom. I gave her a crusty as I walked by. She knew what it was about, I could feel it.

4. I also had to purchase a mop on my lunchbreak. I walk into Smith's Marketplace and grab a mop. Pay for it, and leave. As I'm walking across the parking lot I hear a shout from the OPPOSITE end of the lot: "You're WAY too cute to be carrying a mop!" I turn around to see nobody carrying a mop but myself and see a fat, middle aged man standing about 100 feet away from me with the nastiest grin across his face. My first reaction was to flip him the bird, but I decided against it and ignored him. I'm sorry, but just because I like to wear skirts (and might I add that they are of the appropriate knee- length) does not give any man the right to comment to me from across the parking lot. No, I DON'T take it as a compliment. I think it's creepy and rude. Mind your own business or I'll set my super jealous and protective husband after you.